Practical skills you can return to when life gets noisy.

1. Recognise

Notice when your mind is getting caught in a pattern.

Sometimes one thought can quickly lead to another, and before you realise it you're caught up in a whole chain of thoughts.

• Turning a small worry into worst-case scenarios.
• Analysing the same information repeatedly, trying to become certain.
• Seeking reassurance from yourself or other people.
• Avoiding places, people or situations because of anxiety.

You don't need to work out the thought or make it disappear. You're just noticing that your mind has started getting caught in a pattern.

"I'm caught in a thought spiral."

Then ask yourself what you want to do next.

2. Choose

Work out what needs solving and what needs accepting.

Not every worry should simply be pushed aside. Sometimes there really is a problem that needs dealing with. The skill is recognising the difference between taking reasonable action and thinking about a problem repeatedly without getting anywhere.

If your kitchen roof is leaking, there are practical steps you can take while arranging a repair. Once you've taken the reasonable steps available to you, repeatedly thinking about the leak won't make the repair happen any sooner.

With worries that don't have a definite answer, you may not be able to think your way to certainty.

"What's one reasonable next step?"

If there is something you can reasonably do, do that. If there isn't, see whether you can allow the uncertainty to be there and return to what you're doing.

3. Return

Bring your attention back to what's happening now.

When worries become loud, it's easy to become absorbed in them. Returning means gently bringing your attention back to the present.

If you're washing dishes, notice the bubbles, temperature and movement. If you're walking, notice colours, movement and the feeling of the air. If you're talking to someone, give your attention to what they're saying.

Use an anchor

Your breath can be a useful anchor because it's always available. If focusing on your breathing isn't comfortable or helpful, try another sense: texture, sounds, colours, movement or temperature.

Mindfulness doesn't mean clearing your mind

Thoughts are going to happen. You don't need to stop them or make yourself completely calm. You can acknowledge, "That's a worrying thought," and return your attention to what you're doing.

The return is the practice.

4. Practise

New patterns take time to become familiar.

You might recognise what's happening, return to the present and use your tools—and still feel worried, stressed or overwhelmed. That doesn't automatically mean the tools aren't working.

Old patterns can be well established, so a new response may initially feel strange or forced. With practice, a different response may gradually become more familiar.

Progress isn't about never struggling

Progress might mean noticing the thought sooner, spending less time analysing it, resisting a mental or physical compulsion, or returning to what you were doing rather than allowing worry to take over.

Motivation will come and go

You don't need to feel guilty about difficult days. You can come back to your tools again. You don't have to start from the beginning.

"What response would I like to practise next?"